The truth revealed

Let's get it all out:

Yesterday I went see my ex boyfriend's brother, he is considered to be my friend and my brother. I have not been at their place since October and when I was walking towards their house I was thinking about all the times I walked this way happy about having someone to love. I had flashback of times when we were sitting and kissing and talking and walking. I got to their place, it was a mess. The mother, considered to be my own mother, has been away for 2 month. For sure, the boys are lazy and can't take care of themselves. So I was in the living room and I see flowers. I ask the big brother who are these for, and he tells me for my ex, Rabih. I say oh he has a girlfriend and he looks at me sadly and says yes. I needed to cry so I excused myself and went to the bathroom. I cried a bit, felt better and got out. I went to prepare some food for him and I needed to talk to someone. I excused myself and went to the room and called a friend who made me feel a lot worse. I started crying and then I started screaming and crying and Kamil, the big brother came to the room and hugged me like a father. I cried and I  talked, shaked, bleeded from the nose, had chest pains. Everything got out. He spent some time hugging me and caressing my hair and arms and he told me let it all out. I spent all my time cleaning the house with him and we ate , I was not able to swallow. I stayed there for about 5-6 hours and we talked about how I was feeling. This guy is the same version as me, went through same experiences and has the same personality so he understands my way of thinking. Rabih has a russian gf and he has been dating her for 2-3 weeks. Today, I am very bad and I feel I just got again to level 0. I will be posting when I can all my feelings about it but I am just crying because I got into depression and in the end he got another girlfriend...